I Ordered A Puppy Got Two Incubi Instead Chapter 01

I Ordered A Puppy Got Two Incubi Instead Chapter 01

I ordered an incubus online.

When the package arrived, there were two of them.

One looked sweet and obedient. The other looked like he wanted to bite someone.

So naturally, I messaged customer support.

Me: [Hi, I think there’s been a mistake. I ordered the gentle one.]

Customer Service: [Congratulations, dear customer! You unlocked a hidden limited edition~ ]

Customer Service: [This model is a special promotion. Buy one, get one free~]

A free bonus incubus?

Best deal of my life.

I’d heard people online compare raising an incubus to owning a dog. Except incubuses were better. They could warm your bed, help with chores, cuddle on command, and unlike dogs, they didn’t shed.

If I was already taking care of one, what was the difference with two?

I paid for one incubus and got two.

Absolute steal.

At least, that was what I thought right up until I fed them and ended up trapped between the two of them like the filling in an Oreo.

That was when I realized “warming the bed” was a verb.

…

I’d always had terrible circulation.

No matter how many blankets I piled on during winter, my hands and feet stayed freezing cold all night.

Lately, incubuses had exploded in popularity online. They looked almost human, acted clingy like affectionate dogs, and apparently made excellent housemates.

Most importantly, they were warm.

Winter was coming, and after another miserable season of ice-cold toes, I decided to buy one.

But unlike buying furniture or electronics, incubuses were living beings. You couldn’t just toss them aside once you got bored. Adopting one was a lifetime commitment.

So before buying, I did a ridiculous amount of research.

People online said things like:

[Taking care of an incubus is basically like raising a puppy! As long as you spend time with him and treat him well, he’ll stay loyal to you forever!]

[They’re affectionate, clingy, obedient, and ridiculously devoted. Call their name and they come running with puppy eyes. Honestly? Better than a boyfriend.]

[Girls, trust me and just buy one already! I finally got mine and the reviews DO NOT lie. As long as you keep your incubus satisfied, he’ll do anything you ask. Best purchase of my life.]

[Warning for physically weak girls: don’t buy high-performance models unless you’re prepared to suffer.]

[Seconding this. I bought the enhanced Plus version when I was young and stupid. I’ve been bedridden for two days.]

I stared at the screen, confused.

High-performance?

What did that even mean?

Did incubuses need to be walked or something?

I kept scrolling.

[There are tons of personality types. Sweet ones, cold ones, sunshine boys, toxic ones, mature ones, sarcastic ones… make sure you pick the right incubus for your lifestyle!]

[And returns are a nightmare. Most shops don’t accept refunds after delivery.]

After reading enough reviews, I had a decent understanding of what I wanted.

Unfortunately, my budget was limited.

So I spent days stalking online stores until I finally found one running a massive clearance sale.

Their storefront was full of gorgeous incubus profiles and promotional posters. Honestly, choosing was impossible.

I messaged customer support.

Me: [Hi. I’m looking for a male incubus with a gentle personality who’s good for cuddling and keeping warm.]

I’d specifically decided on a male incubus because people online said their body temperatures ran higher. Perfect for warming cold hands and feet.

Also, what if female incubuses got cold too?

Customer Service: [Hello dear~ I’d be happy to help you today.]

A moment later, they sent over a profile card.

Customer Service: [Based on your preferences, we highly recommend this model~]

Attached was a photo of a beautiful incubus with soft white hair, elegant features, and warm amber eyes.

Customer Service: [This incubus specializes in maximum tenderness and premium emotional companionship~ Guaranteed to make every night unforgettable.]

The marketing was absurdly dramatic.

Then again… the incubus in the picture was ridiculously attractive.

Customer Service: [And you’re in luck! This model is currently 90% off during our flash sale event~ Great taste, dear customer!]

Ninety percent off?

That immediately made me suspicious.

No way something this good was real.

Apparently the customer service rep sensed my hesitation.

Customer Service: [Don’t worry, dear~ All of our incubuses are fully certified and health-checked before shipment.]

Customer Service: [This promotion only lasts for today! Once it’s gone, it’s gone~ If you like him, place your order quickly!]

Then they sent me a short video.

The incubus sat quietly in frame, posture straight and perfect. His white animal-like ears twitched slightly as he looked into the camera with calm amber eyes.

The expression on his face practically screamed:

Please take me home, Master.

My heart folded instantly.

He looked so well-behaved.

Me: [Is this legit? Does he actually look like the video in person?]

Customer Service: [Absolutely authentic~ No filters, no visual differences! The incubus in the video is the exact one you’ll receive.]

Customer Service: [Every incubus in our shop is one-of-a-kind in appearance, size, and personality. Guaranteed exclusive~]

Good enough for me.

Then another question occurred to me.

Me: [Does he need walks?]

There was a long pause.

Customer Service: […No, dear customer. Walking is unnecessary.]

Customer Service: [Although if you enjoy that sort of thing, we can include a complimentary leash and collar set~]

Me: [Great. Add it.]

Just in case.

After confirming there were no other issues, I placed the order for the sweet, obedient incubus.

Right before checkout, a warning popped up on screen.

Store Policy: [Clearance items are non-refundable after delivery.]

Didn’t matter to me.

The discount was insane, and I’d already seen the video anyway.

Two days later, the package finally arrived.

It was Saturday morning, and I was still half-asleep when the delivery notification came through.

Excited, I rushed to the door and opened it.

Standing outside was the exact incubus from the video.

White pointed ears.

Long tail.

A tiny heart-shaped tip swaying behind him.

His amber eyes were bright and gentle, his smile soft enough to melt snow. Every feature looked refined and unreal, his pale skin and elegant demeanor making him seem more like a fantasy prince than something bought online.

“Master,” he said softly, lowering his head.

His tail curled forward obediently, placing the little heart-shaped tip into my hand like an offering.

It was only then that I noticed the second incubus standing behind him.

Wait.

Why was there another one?

At first, I assumed someone’s delivery had gotten mixed up.

Then the second incubus looked directly at me and spoke.

“Master.”

Unlike the first one, this incubus had dark skin, black horns, and an openly irritated expression. He looked like he hated the entire world.

Including me.

I froze.

“…Two?”

Both of them were mine?

Instinctively, I grabbed both heart-tipped tails.

The white-haired incubus smiled warmly.

“If Master has no objections,” he said gently, “we’ll be sealing our bond now~”

Wait.

Hold on a second.

Before I could react, soft white light spread from the tips of their tails into my palms.

Warmth bloomed against my skin.

And in the blink of an eye, the bond was complete.