The College List I Crossed Out To Escape His Shadow Chapter 08

The College List I Crossed Out To Escape His Shadow Chapter 08

“Back then, I thought you didn’t want us ending up at the same school. That’s why you kept

asking where I was applying.”

“It got so bad I couldn’t even stand the sound of Westbrook anymore. So I switched.”

Leo looked stunned. He clearly hadn’t connected my decision to him.

Just like I hadn’t connected his Westbrook choice to me.

I walked toward the door. He followed, stubborn as ever, trying to hand me the book and

medals.

“I still want you to have these.”

I took the book, flipped through it, and gave a faint smile. “It’s okay. Really.”

“Keep the book. I have my own medals.”

He pulled them back, deflated. “Okay. So… are you coming home for the next break?”

I shook my head. “Not sure. If I find a gig or a shift, I probably won’t.”

As I was leaving, he called out again.

“Sasha, can we talk again? Like we used to?”

I took a few steps and stretched my arms. “Talking’s fine. Whether it can be like before? I don’t

know.”

“It’s been over two years. We’ve both changed.

“I’ve got a lot of new people in my life now.”

He caught up to me. “What if I apply to your school for grad school?”

I let out a small laugh. “You heard from my mom that I’m considering staying here for grad

school, didn’t you.”

“But Leo, what if I change my mind again?”

Panic flickered in his eyes. “Where would you go? I can…”

“Leo.” I cut him off, my voice gentler this time. You already spent undergrad at a school that

wasn’t your first choice. This time, don’t you want to finally pick for yourself? Pick somewhere you

actually love.”

He held my gaze. “I’ve thought about it. The school I love is wherever you are. Nothing else

matters to me.”

I opened my mouth, but he kept going before I could argue.

“I know what you’re going to say. You think I’ll regret it. But I won’t. I know exactly what I’m

doing, and I’m ready for whatever comes with it.”

“Just… please, this time, promise me you’ll tell me where you’re going.”

I sighed. “Fine. Whatever you want.”

After that day, Leo did what he said he would. He messaged me from time to time.

Sometimes about stuff happening at his school. Sometimes about the past.

But I could feel it, after more than two years of silence, there was a careful distance between

us now.

I didn’t know the details of his life anymore, and he didn’t know mine.

A lot of the time, I didn’t even know how to respond.

And if I overthought it too long, I’d forget to reply altogether.

He never got upset.

There was always another message waiting.

Eventually, he really did get into my grad program and became my cohort-mate.

Except my cohort included a lot of other people too-friends I’d known since undergrad. Our

bonds ran deep.

At a group dinner, everyone was swapping undergrad stories, laughing hard. Leo sat there,

stiff and out of place.

Watching him, I remembered that feeling all too well.

I smiled and patted his shoulder. “You know, that used to be me.”

He looked at me, confused. “When?”

I propped my chin on my hand and took a sip of my drink. “The day you told me we were hanging out, kept me waiting all afternoon, then dragged me to dinner with a bunch of people you’d spent the whole day with.”

He stared at me for a long moment. Then, quietly, “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking that day.”

I shook my head. “I’m not telling you this so you’ll apologize. I just remembered, that’s all.”

The day we graduated from grad school, he told me he had a question for me.

I asked what it was.

He got all mysterious and refused to say.

It wasn’t until I pressed him that he gave up a crumb.

me.]

[I’ll ask you the day you finally forgive