The Weight I Kept, The Family I Lost Chapter 03

The Weight I Kept, The Family I Lost Chapter 03

Dad finally managed, “She was only six years old.”

Mom nodded quickly. “She was probably just scared. She didn’t dare come out.”

“That smile—it might not have been about you.”

I wasn’t angry at all.

They were just too kind.

Even after seeing Sophie lie with their own eyes, they couldn’t bear to think badly of her.

Dr. Levine looked at me.

“Your parents misunderstood you and hurt you.”

“Not only do you not hate them, but you’re making excuses for them. Why?”

I paused.

“Because they love me the most.”

After I fainted at twelve, Mom didn’t sleep for three days.

Dad cleared his entire schedule and stayed by my hospital bed, asking the doctors over and over why I wouldn’t eat.

Sophie cried and said I’d done it on purpose.

She said I’d faked fainting on her birthday to get Mom and Dad to yell at her. That I was getting revenge.

That was the first time Dad ever snapped at her.

“Clara is in the hospital, and all you can think about is yourself?”

Sophie ran out crying.

Mom didn’t chase her.

She sat by my bed and fed me soup, one spoonful at a time.

That was the first time they didn’t go after Sophie.

I’ll never forget that moment—dizzy, weak, but warm all over.

After that, if I ate a little less, Mom got anxious.

If I skipped one day, she followed me around asking questions.

If I skipped two, she’d sit beside me and cry.

By day three, Dad would skip Sophie’s parent-teacher conference to take me to the hospital.

When I was fourteen, Sophie made it to the finals of a dance competition.

Mom and Dad promised to go watch her.

Before we left, I ate half a plate of noodles.

My stomach suddenly lurched. I ran to the bathroom and threw up everything I’d just eaten.

Mom immediately took off her jacket.

“We’re not going. We’re taking Clara to the hospital.”

Sophie stood in the doorway in her costume, eyes filling with tears.

“It’s my final.”

Dad frowned.

“Clara is throwing up, and you’re still thinking about your competition?”

She went alone that night.

And I lay in a hospital bed, holding Dad’s hand with my left and Mom’s hand with my right.

Sophie won first place.

She put the trophy in the most visible spot in the living room.

Mom and Dad didn’t notice.

They were too busy going over my test results.

I was the most precious thing in the house.

So naturally, I loved them the most too.

Dr. Levine asked quietly, “If they truly love you the most, why do you have to get sick to receive that love?”

The smile on my face froze.

“What do you mean?”

She took my hand and asked, “When you were healthy, what did they ever give up for you?”

I opened my mouth, but my mind went blank.

Mom suddenly started crying.

“Stop. Please.”

“She can’t take any more stress.”

I nodded quickly.

“See?”

“My mom cares about me so much.”

“She can’t even bear to say one harsh word to me.”

Dr. Levine stared at me for a long moment, then let it go.

She opened my file again.

“The patient keeps saying she vomits after eating more than seven ounces.”

“But the human stomach can’t precisely recognize seven ounces.”

She looked at Mom.

“That number didn’t come from her.”

Mom flinched, but I laughed.

“Mom chose it.”

“And the kitchen scale she uses to weigh my food every day? She bought it for me herself.”