Since It’s Already Like This Chapter 03

Since It’s Already Like This Chapter 03

I’d tried to break up with him once before.

Last winter, my fever hit 102. Shivering, I called him and asked him to bring me medicine.

But he said he was at Mira’s. Her period cramps were so bad she couldn’t get out of bed, and he was making her chamomile tea.

I told him I felt awful, too.

He was silent for two seconds, then said, “You can still make a phone call, can’t you? How bad can it be?”

“Order something. It’ll be there in twenty minutes. Just hang in there.”

That was the first time I felt like I truly couldn’t go on.

He was my boyfriend, but I was never his priority.

I told him I wanted to break up.

He didn’t say anything. He just blocked me.

He knew how much I loved him. He knew I’d never leave.

So he was never worried.

He let me cry for two whole days.

Then, he had Mira ask me to dinner.

And in the end, I took him back.

After that, I never mentioned breaking up again.

But this time was different.

I wasn’t angry.

I was serious.

The movers came and went, and the contents of the apartment dwindled.

Only then did I realize that after seven years together, there were barely any traces of Lowell in my home.

A dusty pair of slippers. A mug he had used. I couldn’t find a third thing.

I’d even bought the slippers and the mug myself.

He had never given me a single decent gift.

When Mira moved, he’d bought her an expensive set of scented candles. On her birthday, he got her a huge bouquet of her favorite white roses.

But when it came to me, he always said, “Gifts like that are pointless. When we’re building a life together, it’s better to be practical.”

I’d told him I was unhappy. I’d asked.

But he said, “When I give your friend a gift, aren’t I just helping you maintain your friendship?”

I laughed softly.

My phone rang again. It was my mother.

“Hello, Indy. How did your talk with Lowell go? Have you set a wedding date?”

Not long ago, Lowell and I had just met with both our families.

Everyone got along, but whenever the wedding date came up, Lowell would say he was still focused on his career and wasn’t ready to get married.

At the time, I was disappointed, but I chalked it up to the pressure he was under at work.

Now, I just felt lucky.

If a man couldn’t even find my front door, was I supposed to spend the rest of my life waiting for him to come home?

“Mom, there’s not going to be a wedding. I’m breaking up with him.”